Wednesday, December 30, 2009

If you loved me, you'd obey this chart.

You can see it all the greatness here. Happy New Year! I hope to report back from the coast trip with sightings of whales, stories of greatness and a few chapters done of Suite Francaise.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Who knew? I'm a Blazers fan!

My cousin took me to my first professional basketball game tonight, and it wasn't even the Montinore wine or the Zenner's hot dog (gotta love Portland) that made it so great... I really liked watching the game! It was surprising to me that I was more drawn to watching the court than the jumbotron TV; now THAT is some wholesome American fun!

And yes, I already have a favorite player. Who, you ask? Is it cutie pie LaMarcus Aldridge? Rockstar Brandon Roy? Pshaw. I say pshaw to that.

Why, it's Mr. Rodney Grant, the Associate Director of the President's Council on Physical Fitness... who also played a little organized ball with his friends. Back at Duke.

And there are many reasons to love Juwan Howard but his presence on The West Wing - yes, President Bartlet's Council, not President Obama's - makes him my Blazer from here on out.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Ruminations on Obsessing. (Part 1)

It always starts with something small... a joke at a dinner party that falls flat, the use of an in-crowd term to a person who isn't quite 'in' the crowd yet, a slip-up featuring too much honesty when asked my opinion... and then we're off to the races.

I am a gold-medal-contender for lying in bad at night, obsessing about something I've done/said/written that might be misconstrued/hurtful/annoying. Hours. Hours and hours. Days off from work? Spent bringing it up, over and over, to John, or anyone who happens to call me, and scrutinizing the minutiae of my perceived mistake.

What do you do in cases like this? Not for a second do I think I'm rare in my ability to obsess... enough blogs, conversations, Sex and the City episodes, Facebook posts and apologies-days-later have come way to know that this is a trait others share. How do YOU beat back the obsessies?

(Part 2 will be written at a time TBD. I'm pre-obsessing on how much I ought to reveal about numerous recent events that inspire such obsession.)

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

And despite myself...

It's almost Christmas Eve... and even if there isn't snow (like in my childhood Christmases), and even if there isn't a George Winston CD playing (though I can put it on the iPod if I want), and even if I *know* Santa isn't coming (is he?), and even though I don't have a new velvet dress to wear (but I do have purple tights)...

And even though I DO have work to do, and a bathroom to clean, and files to file, and supplemental food to cook plus gifts to buy for my various big-cooking Christmas hosts...

That magical, calm-and-quiet, anticipatory Christmas feeling is starting to sneak in at the edges.

I'm hearing "O Holy Night" and the cookie jar is lightly, but acceptably, filled. I'm planning to sign off work very soon, and I spent this evening in great holiday cheer with M and E, at their house. My whole world is taking a great big in-breath, and I have a holiday days date with the Little House books, a ridonk pile of gifts, egg nog, champagne, cozy blankets and my new husband.

Uh, just one more trip to Fred Meyer first.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Let's All Go to the Movies.

Another installment of sexism at the movies!

If Cameron Diaz were as bloated and overweight as Luke Wilson has become, she would never be cast in a (albeit vacuous) big budget, star-filled, rom-com movie like "Valentine's Day".

Watching the preview for "Remember Me" it appeared to be a wrong-side-of-the-tracks love story, where the father of The Girl and the father of The Boy also may duke it out. Which makes sense. Because so many people are raised by single fathers in the world today. Single fathers as primary caregivers - they're everywhere!! Single moms? Who? Portraying them would give women in Hollywood roles, AND illustrate a common life occurrence. So: pshaw. No way.

And a yay for Nancy Meyers! No matter what else we can say about her, I'm delighted that the preview for "It's Complicated" describes Alec Baldwin's character as the "ex" of the main character, a woman, and Steve Martin's as her "architect". She is truly the main character, even in the context of telling us who the others are, and THAT is a rarity in Hollywood indeed.

Ha Ha: The Not-Funny Kind.

You can read more about it here, but the highlight reel?

The new policy for US servicemen/women in Iraq? You can, and will be, court martialed for getting pregnant or getting someone pregnant while on a tour of duty there.

Of course, military hospitals won't provide abortions.

Nor do they provide the morning-after pill. (And yeah I don't think the Iraqi CVS is well-stocked.) And, as Anna N. points out, it's far easier to identify pregnant people versus impregnators.

Merry Christmas from the growing abstinence movement!

Saturday, December 12, 2009


ME: Hey, you know that song I like, Lisztomania? From this tribute-to-a-tribute that I loved?

J: Yes, I do.

ME: Well I just found out that the band is French!

J: Oh. They sound sort of sound like The Postal Service to me.

ME: Yeah. They sound hipster-y. Is there such a thing as French hipsters?

J: I think they invented it.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Fresh or Frozen?

As intimacy in a partnership grows, so does confidence... in each other's grocery shopping skills. While I still write things like "flour: all purpose, enriched, unbleached" on the shopping list (because, hey!, there are many options in that aisle and I want to make it easy!) and he specifies the ranking of preferred body wash scents (Aqua Reef is #1, Pure Sport is #2 and After Dark is always last), it's a joy to find that some things become fully simpatico.

We'd never, ever buy frozen Brussels sprouts after falling in love with fresh ones in recent years; on the list this now never needs to be specified. Tortillas always mean Guerrero brand and "apples" never, ever means Golden Delicious! It means Pink Lady or Honeycrisp, but of course.

And though I am confessional and cozy today, I can admit that sure, this probably sounds about as boring as all-get-out to the single and fabulous. But I promise it is so great to write down "bananas" and get three organic, on-the-green-side snacks, just like ya like 'em. Ahh.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

All I know is, I *don't* want to know.

Why does the Target brand spray-and-leave-on shower cleaner work so much better than the stuff that is twice or three times as much?

And more eerily, why does the $1.99 XCEL brand (Walgreen's) drain unclogger stuff work amazingly well, when the $5.99 Liquid Plumr or Drano don't work worth a lump of coal?

I refuse to look at ingredients. Or country of origin/production.


Not the usual kind, but the kind from too much (mental) cotton candy... also known as "Sex and the City" on DVD.

In the way that traveling and eating only junk food eventually inspires cravings for spinach salad and sauteed beet greens; in the way that too many Netflix'ed documentaries means a viewing of "Blue Crush" becomes required... this is the way that watching too much "Sex and the City" makes a person uninterested in any number of normally fun things: high heels, having sex, telling people "I'm a writer", drinking at morning brunch, talking about men.

But never cigarettes or curly hair. If there are two things the inimitable SJP can do, it's smoke a cigarette sexily (making even this never-again-smoker want a Parliament) and rock the curly hair (making this new-to-embracing-her-curls woman want to wear 'em au naturel).

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Definition of Douche

Guy in Fred Meyer tonight.

In flip flops and shorts.

GAH! It is 28 degrees and humid enough for even a Montana girl to be chilled to the bone!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Actions, not words.

You know the feeling of getting into a cold bed? Where the door to the bedroom has been closed all day, with the heat off, and it's 35 degrees outside? It's a corner room so it is drafty? You know the feeling of cold, cold sheets on your bare toes and tired body?

It is real love - in action, and not just words - when your husband lies on your side for five minutes first, warming it up for you, and then endures the cold a second time on his side. Cue: awwww.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Complaint week continues.

There is a line where enough is enough... and I don't know *precisely* where it is... but I can safely say that 10 groomsmen, 5 bridesmaids, 2 junior bridesmaids, 2 ring bearers and 2 flower girls is way, way, way past that line.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Spelling Jeanyuses.

It has been proven over and over again that spelling skills are not correlated with intelligence. And yet, as a deep Southern accent screams "uneducated", so do bad spelling skills. Some really top-notch stuff from Facebook today...
  • "the cops were banging on my nabor's door" (ah, that rascally neighbor on Mt. Tabor)
  • "it was scarey, he was sesering" (pointed out to be seizure-ing)
  • "i'm now excepting gift cards for xmas" (how are you doing that??)
  • "bad day - getting splashed with the hater-aid" (they must mean hater-ade, right? surely she doesn't want to HELP the haters?)
Spelling snobbery is snobbery of the worst kind, I say with a sniff. But nabor?! Happy December, all.