Monday, July 13, 2009

How To Be a Bad Waiter.

Great French cafe in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn, yesterday.

10 AM, about half-full cafe, the sun has risen above the brick building next door and is shining down on us, on the lovely outdoor patio, where I looked up to see a neighbor in his jammies checking out how busy the cafe was from his 4th floor deck next door. (Great classic blue jammies a la Josh in Season 1 WW.)

"Excuse me, Painfully Hip Waiter Who Has Not Checked on Us in Forty Minutes, would you mind raising the umbrella at the table next to us, as it will cast a shadow that will partially protect our umbrella-free table, and then can we order mimosas for dessert, giving you a bigger tip?"

(Well, that's basically what I said.) He replied:

"I'll get you the mimosas, and YOU can feel free to ask that other table."

Holy cannoli.

It's very, very tough to get me to tip less than 15% - EVER. But sorry, Brooklyn hipster. And sheesh, lots of people out there are looking for table-waiting gigs, and they have to be nicer than that!!

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