Wednesday, March 13, 2013

You don't know you.

Are you familiar with the drunk friend, who has had two cocktails too many, and is full of enough piss and vinegar to get annoyed with you when you try to tell them something you've observed?

"Pshhhh, you don't know me. Nobody knows me..." they say, stumbling around the edge of the bar, headed for the bathroom.

(I actually know someone whose nickname-when-drunk is "You Don't Know Me Jay".)

Well since my last post I've been in the long process of interviewing for, and then accepting, a new job - plus putting in notice at my current job and attempting to wrap up a role there that has expanded over the last 3+ years into something wonderful - but something uniquely my own - and thus not easy to train someone new for, especially on paper in the one grand exit memo I'm writing.

In this nerve-wracking time - as any time of change and transition is sure to be - I've learned a few interesting things. The first is the title of this post, said by (whom else?!) my husband, King of Hitting The Nail on the Head.

So as I waited for a call back, or an email, I was in a twirl of panic about my ability... my likability, my career flexibility, my skill portability... when John said, "You have all that stuff down pat. They'll see it, even if you're not sure of it right now. You even said you walked in there confident and relaxed and only got nervous after the interview, when you realized you really DID want the job. You're not worried about this. Right now? You don't even know you."

With a wink, he was totally right.

In what ways don't you know you? What do you tell yourself, about yourself, that the outside world consistently contradicts? Are you too shy, too lazy, too unable to create an original joke? But then people invite you to parties and leave you alone, merely introduced to someone new, or your home and hearth is squared away as can be, or people belly-laugh at things you say at work rather often?

If we could choose (and of course we can) to stop believing that little nitpicky voice, what things would we know (or not know!) about ourselves, and be delighted to begin acting upon? We might find a new job, at the very least.

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